Freedom is painful, ladies and gentlemen, that’s why we don’t want it. To free ourselves from the false self, from our masks and roles by which we live a social life, by which we pretend and play the roles given by others and to begin to discover our true selves, that point where free and infinite consciousness penetrates the horizontal of time and space called “our life”, and eventually to live what is real, being aware that we are neither a person, nor a role playing, nor a mask, but this consciousness that is confined within us in a certain point of manifestation, without a feeling of bondage, playing the game it itself had created – that kind of freedom is expensive. By being free in such a way, you will tell your partner what is his or hers purpose – to scratch the itch or to reproduce, you will let your child go when the time comes and tell him “go now, life is what you make it”, you will tell your friends that “you are not their garbage can” or “a crying shoulder”, you won’t be a slave to the slaves whether through personal, social or business relationships. In this kind of freedom you will not seek comfort, because you will know that there is no “self” out there, and because of that fact you will not build a “false self” and play the roles of a wretch, of a dramatist, of an action hero.
And it all costs. It’s very expensive, for it means to grow up, to become an adult, to be awake. No, you won’t have anyone to call for help when your car breaks in the middle of nowhere, except calling highway patrol which is expensive, because you won’t have any friends. You won’t get a consolation from your partner, because you will not give it to him or her in the first place. You will most likely die on your own just as you were born. Your parents will have their own life without your presence, except once every two or three months for a two-hour Sunday lunch where you’ll just nod your head. No, your mother will not be happy with you, because an awake man brings misfortune to the asleep, not fortune. No, there will be no flirting, sentimentality, infantility; it will all become simple, ordinary, without the pomp and significance. You won’t be able to loose yourself even in best sex, but you’ll be surprised with what you’ll se on top or under yourself. You will be awake even when the whole world enjoys and sleeps. No one will understand you, no one will care for you nor will you care for them. People will be ashamed of you, for who the heck would be proud of someone who has a “bad reputation”? Objectively, who? Only those who are on the peak of becoming awake, who know what it’s all about, and not the rest of the folks. You’ll be FINALLY alone. Not lonely, for you’ll have other bodies around you as much as you wish or want, but ALONE within and outside of you. You will need to know how to make money, for you won’t have anyone to carry your stuff into your new house; you’ll have to pay for everything. Even the so-called friends will ask you for the money, which is great, because then you’ll have guts to tell them “sorry buddy, I don’t see the point of you sitting and drinking coffe here with me, telling your drama-stories, your tragedies… go and tell them to the likes of you”.
This is why most of the folks don’t seek what we offer. They seek comfort, value, worthiness, importance, a meaningful death as if such a thing exists. These people are not worth spending a single minute with because you serve them as food while they give you nothing in return. It’s not that you need something, you don’t. But fuck it, it’s called the exchange of goods in this illusory civilization. The spiritual market is unaware of this, but folks from the market know how to make up the stories about it. They are like moles that like to talk about the sun although they’ve never seen it. You will learn over time how to be less brutal with others, how to lie and play games again, but without putting your “heart” into it. What are you going to do as such? I don’t know. But I know that you will feel what Life is, what the Force is, what Consciousness (God) is; you will feel that True Self is No Self. And this is something you won’t feel with anyone around you, knowing that you never even felt it with others and that all your dream games were a substitute for it. Well, there will be no more substitutes for that “feeling“. The pain only lasts as you go through the process of waking up. When you feel the pain in this process you will welcome it and be joyfull for it’s arising, for it is a sign of awakening, of becoming adult, of growing up.
And the others, hmm… which others?